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Screening People To Meet Offline

The following article was written and copyright by: Sapphire Debonee and may not be republished or reproduced in any form without written consent by the author. Contact info: e-mail, ICQ: 23674379

One of the biggest problems with meeting people offline for the first time is dealing with fakes. Unfortunately, there are a lot of fakes on vampire elists, message boards, and chats. I'm not going to deny that. I'm not however saying that everyone participating on these are fakes either. I will say that a lot of people who either really just want to be or really just like vampires and want to get closer to this community will sign up just to feel a part of the "in" crowd. They'll even say they're a vampire, but they're not. That's the sort of drivel you have to sort through sometimes.

I myself have met a lot people, most who were normal, but one who was a complete delusional psychopath, bordering on diagnosable paranoid schizophrenia. (She turned out to be 32 year runaway who left her husband and 3 kids.)

The easiest way I've found to meet normal people is first talk to them in email and chat/im. But..here's the kicker, don't talk about vampirism when you do. Talk about regular everyday stuff, if the person keeps switching the convo back to vampires more than you'd like it's sometimes an indication of tad obsessiveness. Which you can take as a possible red flag and help decide if you really want to pursue meeting this person. If those convos go okay, you can decide to talk on the phone. Talk about the same as you did in the online chats using the same guideline. If that works out well, try going for the actual face to face meeting. But don't put any pressure or expectations on it. Go someplace casual to meet and talk. (Still visible within the public eye for safety reasons!) The zoo or art museum for example is a great place to meet up for the first time. This is the time you want to be more focused on the vampire situation. Be straight forward about it, and avoid being fluffy or flirty about it. By that, don't tease about biting people's skin or sucking on it. It can act like a sexual enticement and change the impression of the meeting entirely. Explain it realisticly. Typically you'll get a better response from the person overall. I've had some really good experiences in meeting normal vampires and non vamps alike by doing the above beforehand (One of which resulted in a very good friendship I have with a vampire in IL.) and also following some basic safety tips.

Don't meet someone alone, always take a friend if possible. If a friend is not available bring a working cell phone.
Agree to meet at a public place in an area that you know well and preferably not late at night.
Let someone you know (from your personal circle) that you're meeting someone and the general details of time and place and expected time back.
Avoid drinking alcohol at these meetings. If you do go for a drink, buy your own, keep it light, and keep your eye on it. Date rape drugs are all to easily available these days - This goes for guys as well as girls.
If you begin to feel uncomfortable or unsafe with this person, leave IMMEDIATELY. You are not under any obligation to stay and keep this person company.

There is one guideline you should always follow though. NEVER go to meet someone under pressure. Especially if this pressure is coming from the person who wants to meet you. A common example is they don't believe what you've told them and they want you to prove it to them. This type of person generally is NOT interested in meeting a real vampire. They're interested disproving you're a vampire from the perspective they have of vampires. These type of meetings generally do not work out well and are often a waste of time, money, and energy.